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Cliff Edge Activity
Cliff Edge
Understanding the Cliff Edge Activity
My Cliff Edge activity will help you put together what we have covered so far.
Doing the activity is equivalent to the moment of awareness in my Cliff Edge story when you stop going over your Cliff Edges, save yourself from yet another bruising landing, and start travelling down the path to your Over There place, where in your retirement, you are who you want to be, doing what you want to be doing and living the life you want to be living.
By mapping out your unhelpful and helpful patterns across attention, thinking, beliefs, and behaviours, you create a visual bridge between where you are now and where you want to be.
Suggestions
How to Go About the Activity
Do the activity more than once, with gaps in between, as it can take time to become helpfully aware of your patterns.
Consider the areas of your life impacted by your patterns that you think are relevant by revisiting The Meaning Map activity from Chapter Two.
Do the activity yourself and, if possible, with at least one trusted other either from within your existing support network or from outside of it.
Remind yourself that you cannot afford to keep repeating your unhelpful patterns or neglect your helpful ones.
Appreciate your findings regardless of what you discover. It doesn’t matter how often you are going over your Cliff Edges, only that you become aware of doing so.
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Anne’s Cliff Edge Activity – Completed Example
Explore Anne’s completed case study to understand the difference between unhelpful cliff-edge patterns and helpful, constructive patterns.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
Always focusing on other people, what they think about me now I’m retired, what they believe about me.
Helpful: In your Over There place
I have better days when I text people and ask how they are. Time in my garden. I manage to read a few pages of my book.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
I am very negative and self-critical about the mess I am making of my retirement.
Helpful: In your Over There place
I sometimes think about enrolling on a Royal Horticultural Society course and signing up for meditation sessions at my local Buddhist centre. When I think about these options, I get a glimpse of my old self and the plans I had for retirement. I think about singing again.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
No one wants to know me now I’m retired.
Helpful: In your Over There place
People always reply to my texts, ask me how I am and whether I would like to meet. I sometimes question myself. Maybe I have got myself and others wrong?
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
Withdrawn and isolated. Plenty of routines that keep me at home – housework and television watching.
Helpful: In your Over There place
Occasionally, I text family and friends or go out to the shops. Tending to my garden and talking to my nearest neighbour over the fence. On rare occasions, I sing and play my guitar.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
Very low. Numb. Scared.
Helpful: In your Over There place
Flickers of something more positive. Talking to my neighbour has the biggest effect on my mood.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
What is there to say? I’ve cut myself off. I spend far too much time in my house, that’s for sure. I have possessions, but I can’t say what I gain from them.
Helpful: In your Over There place
My garden brings me some happiness, however fleeting, as does my cat. My neighbour. Our conversations are getting longer and more frequent. Note to self: I keep putting my neighbour down.
Unhelpful: Going over Cliff Edges
I am slow at doing things, that’s for sure.
Helpful: In your Over There place
Some stuff gets done.
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Your Cliff Edge Activity
Use this interactive worksheet to map your own patterns.
Compare your unhelpful patterns (going over your Cliff Edges) with your helpful patterns (moving to your Over There place) across each category. Your entries are auto-saved as you type. Take your time, reflect on each category, and feel free to revisit this page to update your insights.